Don't ask your child what they want to be when they grow up

Tuesday, 14 November 2017

Risk taking, and the ability to fail fast, have supplanted excellence and perfection as the keys to success, says Alexia Hilbertidou.

OPINION: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

As predictable as an 11pm tweet from a certain president, this seemingly innocuous query is asked of me almost daily from well-meaning parents, teachers, relatives - and random adults at social events.

The question slips out to every child we meet, but have we ever stopped to consider its impact?

Asking children what they want to be leads them to aspire to be specialists rather than generalists - at a time when recruiters are increasingly seeking out multi-dimensional employees.

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The day of the specialist working in isolation is over. Those who will thrive will be the writer who can harness an entrepreneurial mindset, utilising marketing and technical knowledge to self publish, promote via social media and build their own website; and the computer programmer who can predict trends and understand a range of perspectives.

Recently, I was invited to work with the Nasa team on the 2017 SOFIA deployment - an opportunity I'm sure many were more qualified for. But it was my skills outside of science - my ability to communicate and my passion and dedication to fostering a love for science in young people - which led to my selection.

The rise of technology has made information so widely available, that power has shifted to big-picture generalists, who have embraced diverse fields of knowledge.

Risk-taking, and the ability to fail fast, have supplanted excellence and perfection as the keys to success. Girls, in particular, need to wake up to this reality and stop prioritising 'easy' NCEA Excellence credits over more challenging future focussed skills.

This tendency to take the easiest path, so as to maintain 'perfect' grades, just won't cut it in the age of technology.

The fact that I was the only girl in my Year 12 IT class and my Y13 Advanced Physics class was so outrageous to me that I started GirlBoss NZ - an organisation dedicated to supporting young women into the careers of the future.

How I cringe when I hear older women speak of themselves as 'hopeless with money' and 'useless at maths' in front of porous young minds.

The days of 'finding a husband to look after us' are long gone, and unless we are OK with the perpetuation of poor economic outcomes for women, we had better make numerically based skills - such as those required for financial capability- a necessity for both boys and girls.

When asked what they want to be, young people's responses so closely reflect gender stereotypes and socio-economic background it's frightening. Policewoman, nurse or teacher (ambitious low decile female); engineer, lawyer, financier (any high decile male) or All Black (most males any decile), or some other predictable answer.

Whilst the question may have been relevant in an age where there were generations of farmers or bakers or blacksmiths, it no longer works in our rapidly changing society. With NZIER predicting 46 per cent of today's jobs will be lost in the next 20 years, how can a child wrap themselves in an identity, such as truck driver, when these jobs may simply not exist?

So, my advice for parents - encourage your children to push themselves in areas outside of their comfort zone. Not choosing the subjects they can get the best grades in but the subjects in which they will grow.

If your child is outstanding at art, encourage them to also choose a STEM subject (science, technology, engineering and maths).

The opportunity to develop those skills may not arise again, and opting out early will limit their options at university and beyond. At worst, they have learned crucial skills they wouldn't have developed otherwise, and at best, they will bring their scientific knowledge to their art endeavours, surely giving them and their work the X-factor.

If your child loves science, encourage them to try debating, or drama, or enrol in Toastmasters. These new experiences will foster appreciation and respect for the broadest range of human accomplishments.

New Zealand needs citizens who can 'be' many things.

Instead of asking children what career they want to do, ask them what problems they want to solve, ask them what motivates them, start asking them what change they want to see.

With jobs evolving so rapidly, children need to stop choosing their careers and instead choose their purpose. With the democratisation of information, the leaders of tomorrow will be those who can utilise a broad range of skills to adapt, predict and innovate.

As the Founder and CEO of GirlBoss NZ, Alexia is committed to ensuring the next generation of changemakeHers are at the table - the boardroom table, that is.