Lesbian icon receives Order of Merit for staunch advocacy to NZ rainbow community

Sunday, 5 June 2022

Miriam Saphira has spent over 50 years supporting marginalised communities.

For a long time, Miriam Saphira thought she was a freak.

“I always knew I was homosexual – I didn’t know the word ‘lesbian’ – but I read in an encyclopaedia that homosexuals had arrested development and I thought, ‘I’m a freak’.”

That mindset led her to marrying a man after becoming pregnant at 19.

Five children later and a psychology degree under her belt, she decided she didn’t want to live a lie any more and took a leap of faith coming out in the 1970s – before homosexuality was legalised in New Zealand.

* When being in love was a criminal act

* How do you know you are lesbian rather than bisexual?

Jenny Rankine coordinator of the Charlotte Museum and Miriam Saphira, secretary of the Charlotte Museum Trust board.

Now at 80 years old, Saphira has a phD, just celebrated eight years of marriage to her loving wife, and on Monday was made a companion of the New Zealand Order of Merit for her staunch advocacy for the rainbow community.

“It’s all about love and that’s what pulls you through.”

But in typical Kiwi fashion, she was both humbled and surprised by the honour.

“I’m used to dealing with hard topics, I suppose. I seem to be attracted them, but I don’t often get recognition for them,” Saphira said.

Saphira’s motivation to advocate for marginalised communities – particularly children, women in abusive relationships and the lesbian and gay community – comes from her own personal experiences.

After struggling with her own sexuality and the trauma of being molested as a child, she wanted to create safe spaces and accurate research for people like her.

At 26, she began a career in psychology, becoming instrumental in conversations on taboo subjects such as incest, sexual abuse of children, prostitution and violence against women.

She also worked with sex offenders for more than 10 years, did a doctorate study on children understanding sexual orientation, and supported women in the justice system.

In 1981, she published The Sexual Abuse of Children, a book which has become a key reference for those working with abused children and offenders.

She also presented at numerous conferences between 1978 and 2003, to increase awareness on these issues in New Zealand.

But the work Saphira is most proud of is her involvement in Homosexual Law Reform and New Zealand’s first lesbian museum – Charlotte Museum Trust.

“It was a very difficult time,” she said of pre-law reform days. “It was worse for men because they got put into prison, but women were put into mental institutes.

“This gave us hope that the world was changing and generations after us would no longer suffer the way we did.”

-An earlier version of this story listed Miriam Saphira’s award as officer of the New Zealand Order of Merit. She is a companion of the Order. Amended 9.50am June 6, 2022.