‘Absurd’ and ‘stupid’: Golriz Ghahraman says her shoplifting was a form of ‘self-sabotage’

Thursday, 27 June 2024

Golriz Ghahraman has labelled her shoplifting as “absurd” and “stupid” in her first interview since being convicted.

The former Green MP said she was in “self-sabotage” mode when she stole from three shops in 2023.

Ghahraman said she now has a diagnosis of extremely severe post-traumatic stress disorder.

Former Green MP Golriz Ghahraman has given her first full interview since being convicted of shoplifting.

Speaking with TVNZ’s John Campbell, Ghahraman said she was as “baffled as anyone” as to why she decided to steal clothes from three stores in 2023, actions she was convicted for on Thursday.

“What the hell was I doing? I wasn’t unaware that I was doing something bad,” Ghahraman said.

“I was already in crisis. In that world of self-loathing, that place where you sit where you are so low on yourself that it makes sense to harm yourself,” she told Campbell.

Ghahraman said she didn’t go to the stores to steal, instead describing her actions as a form of “self-sabotage”. “I didn’t intentionally do the thing. It was something tangible that I could point to, to say there was something wrong with you.”

She said the self-sabotage was to get out. “If I sat down and processed the fact that I needed to get out, I would have done things differently.”

Ghahraman told Campbell her biggest regret was that she caused other people stress and harm because she couldn’t stop to acknowledge there was something wrong with her.

“I couldn’t stop and go well actually there is something wrong with you, get help, or quit, which is what I should have done.”

Gharaman said she is now undertaking trauma therapy as a result of her behaviour and past experiences in Iran and as a politician in New Zealand.

“What I was living in was persistent stress and trauma that I had numbed myself to,” she said.

“You just keep upping your threshold to what is acceptable to bare.”

Gharaman reiterated that she had never used her mental health as an excuse for the shop lifting.

“I wish I could just apologise for the shop lifting and plead guilty and not have to talk about this other personal thing that the world doesn’t treat very kindly,” she said.

She said she now has a diagnosis of extremely severe post-traumatic stress disorder due to the violence of her childhood in Iran and her experience as a politician.

Gharaman said the abuse and threats came immediately from the point she announced her candidacy for parliament. “The threats are of rape and physical violence and they got worse and worse,” she said.

Gharaman labelled her actions as “absurd” and “stupid” but said she wanted to punish herself in a really stupid way.

“It was bizarre behaviour. It is sabotage. It is sabotage that hurt others in my case. It is hurting a political party that I care deeply about, my parents, the owners, and the movements that I supported.”

The former MP said many people of all political colours reached out to her to see whether she was doing okay.

“National party ministers did, which I wasn’t expecting, loads of people from Labour, loads of people from everywhere around New Zealand.”

She said she didn’t feel deserving of that support but it got her through.

However, Gharaman did acknowledge there wasn’t that level of support from the parliamentary end of the Green party. “There is work to do” she said.

On the question of whether she would have gone into parliament now, Gharaman said she wouldn’t have. “I wouldn’t do it. I think there are better things to do for our communities.”

Gharaman was convicted and ordered to pay a fine of $1600 and court costs of $260.