‘This wasn’t a playground scuffle - he was beaten until he collapsed’

Sunday, 16 November 2025

A 13-year-old Auckland Grammar boarder was beaten unconscious by three older boys — yet the alleged assault wasn’t reported to police for weeks, the school labelled it a play fight, disciplined the teenager and lost key evidence.

More than a year later, the family claims senior staff mishandled the attack so severely it forced the boy out of the prestigious school.

The incident occurred in a school toilet block just six weeks after the boy started at the boarding school.

Medical records show he suffered a concussion, bruising to his forehead, blurred vision and bleeding in one eye.

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Despite the severity of his injuries, the school initially treated the incident as horsing around, giving the teenager a formal warning and disciplining him. It is not clear what consequences the older boys faced.

The boy’s father believes critical evidence, including CCTV footage and student-recorded video of the attack, referred to in witness statements, was not preserved, complicating any attempt to hold the perpetrators accountable.

(Because the traumatised teen is a minor and has chosen not to speak publicly about the attack, the Sunday Star-Times has agreed not to identify him.)

“Our son has only sporadically attended school since the attack – it has been horrific for him.

“This isn’t simply a matter of him returning to school with a vague assurance for his safety. He has real concerns about retribution, and the trauma has been immense,” the boy’s father, a prominent lawyer, said.

From confident student to ‘a ghost’

The attack on February 28, 2024, came after previous bullying.

The teenager’s father said he was earlier targeted in the school’s boarding house, where a senior prefect allegedly pulled him from bed and threw him against a wall.

The toilet block attack was preceded by a verbal confrontation outside the tuck shop, which the family believes may have been motivated by xenophobia. The boy had lived overseas for the first 11 years of his life, and they say a student reportedly took issue with his accent.

A prefect found the boy collapsed on the floor and alerted a teacher, who, along with the school matron and nurse, rushed him to the on-site medical centre and then immediately to Starship Hospital. Medical records seen by the Sunday Star-Times refer to repeated punches to the head over several minutes.

The school collected conflicting accounts of the incident which were later supplied to the family. At first, while being treated for concussion, the teenager claimedhe was confronted by eight senior students and that three punched him 8-to-9 times. The school matron's report noted his account was 'very unclear and changing'. Later, in a hand-written statement, he confirmed playing with two students, estimating about 20 taps.

The two students, who also gave statements, claimed the strikes to his head were accidental due to height differences or his 'weav[ing] into my hit'. One admitted hitting him on the shoulder, twice in the torso, and once 'accidentally' in the head.

Before the alleged assault, the boy was described by his father as “confident, curious, and full of energy” - although he had been affected by the recent move to Auckland.

After the attack, everything changed: “He became a ghost. He stopped talking to people, stopped participating in things he loved, and it was like he disappeared in front of our eyes.”

On March 8, the father met with Deputy Headmaster David Askew and Form 3 Dean Matthew Cumming.

The school prepared a one-page summary of the incident, which framed it as a friendly game of “taps” - where pupils play fight each other by tapping the shoulders or arms. Because the game is banned by the school, the boy was disciplined.

This was “designed to minimise” what happened, the father says. “This wasn’t a playground scuffle - he was beaten until he collapsed.”

Unable to marry the explanation with the severity of the child’s injuries, and worried about further bullying, his parents asked the school to notify police about the attack.

The request was refused.

It wasn’t until May 2024, when the family received partial documentation through an official information request, that they learned the full extent of the alleged assault.

Critical evidence was never preserved. CCTV footage showing the boys arriving at and leaving the toilet block was later reported by the school as having been “written over.”

A cellphone recording reportedly made by other students who witnessed the incident, mentioned in early witness statements, were also not obtained.

On May 2, 2024, the boy’s father met with Headmaster Tim O’Connor and then Board Chair, Mark Sandelin.

He again requested the school notify police but the school maintained the incident was a play fight. He also raised ongoing welfare concerns, including the boy’s withdrawal from school life, irregular attendance, and fear of retribution.

It wasn’t until August, after repeated emails highlighting the school’s alleged inaction, that the school contacted Newmarket Constable Richard Tan, an initial police involvement that resulted in no action.

By October, another Constable, Andrew Quensell, accompanied the family to the school to meet Associate Headmaster Sam McNaughton and requested evidence and documentation.

In February 2025, Quensell contacted O’Connor directly, asking for all relevant CCTV and witness footage. The headmaster responded that the CCTV footage outside the toilet block had been “written over”, and other student-recorded video was not obtained.

Humiliated on the first day of the new year

Throughout this period, the teen’s mental health deteriorated. The school offered counselling and other support, but these were declined by the boy, who said he was terrified of returning.

Then, tensions over enrolment began to emerge.

After the attack, the teenager was allowed to live at home instead of returning to the $20k-a-year boarding house, a dispensation granted so he could recover with his family.

But in July 2024, O’Connor began raising concerns about how long he could remain out of zone, and by September, the school was formally reviewing his enrolment.

“The school was clearly trying to kick him out,” his father claimed. . “They kept raising concerns about attendance and behaviour, but this ignored the trauma he was dealing with.”

When he started the new school year, he was publicly held back a year in front of his classmates.

“They made the decision without even talking to us first. On the first day of the new school year… it was humiliating, and it just added to everything he’d been through.”

The fraught dealings with the school continued to have a profound impact on his behaviour. “He started mixing with people we didn’t know and who worried us, simply because he felt unsafe and was trying to protect himself,” the father says.

His parents repeatedly lost track of him, and his absences from home grew longer and more frequent.

By late October 2025, the boy had been missing for weeks, prompting his mother to contact police on October 29. Although located, the family says the boy remained fearful and disengaged, reluctant to speak about the alleged assault or cooperate with police processes. His mother recently dis-enrolled him from the school.

The boy’s father claims police failed to take his own statements alleging the school mishandled evidence, and did not consider other evidence including the hospital and matron reports.

He has twice written to Police Commissioner Richard Chambers, a Grammar old boy.

In late October, Chambers referred the matter to Auckland City District Commander Superintendent Sunny Patel, writing: “I am very sorry to hear about the assault on your son… As a father myself I fully appreciate the impact this has had… I am also particularly concerned to learn that the incident has happened at my old school, Auckland Grammar.”

Chambers said police would require the child to be formally interviewed, adding that a statement “is not essential, but it would be very helpful”.

“My son feels very let down, by everyone,” his father says. “You can imagine - if you’re beaten, then the school says it was a play fight and punishes you, it’s impossible not to feel disillusioned. He’s basically lost faith in the system, the rules, and everything.

“He’s told me he doesn’t believe anything will happen, that the police won’t act, the school won’t act. He’s become very cynical. That’s why he won’t give a statement [to police] he’s scared of retribution, and he doesn’t want to do anything that he thinks won’t make a difference.”

The family’s concerns about bullying are not isolated.

In 2018, Auckland Grammar paid out $20,000 to settle a claim after a student’s jaw was broken in two “vicious assaults” in 2005 by another boarder, a High Court judgment shows. The school suspended the attacker for approximately six weeks.

Justice Anne Hinton described the assaults as “horrifying”.

The boy’s father also pointed to an interview last year, in which O’Connor said he believed students should learn how to cope with challenges. “I’m over resilience, I think resilience is now a cliche and we actually need to be teaching them to be less fragile,” he said.

School, police defend handling of case

Auckland Grammar School was sent detailed questions about its handling of the incident. The Star-Times approached O’Connor, board chair Grant Trethewey and the school’s general office over the past week. On Friday, O“Connor responded: “Auckland Grammar School does not discuss matters related to individual students in the media. It takes allegations of harm against any student in our care very seriously. Any such allegations are investigated in accordance with due process.

“When allegations of assault are made, the relevant authorities, including the Police and the Ministry of Education, are notified. As a matter of practice, the School offers specialist support for any student affected by any breach of our School Rules.”

Earlier, in a series of letters to the family, the school defended its handling of the matter, saying it followed its investigation procedures and provided extensive support to the teenager.

It said counselling was offered repeatedly, including independent off-campus sessions, placement in the school’s Kia Mate programme, and daily check-ins.

The school also maintained that disciplinary measures against the boy were consistent with school rules, and that the other students involved received consequences where warranted.

It also says it encouraged the family to lodge a police complaint directly, which it would then support.

Police said the alleged assault was first reported on May 20, 2024, when the boy’s father attended the Auckland City Police Hub.

In a statement to the Sunday Star-Times, Detective Inspector Chris Barry said further information was requested to progress enquiries, but that the child was reluctant to give a statement.

“Youth Services staff assigned to the matter have made several attempts to meet with the young person to discuss how he sustained his injuries. At this point in time, he has exercised his right to decline to provide a formal statement to Police.”

Barry noted that conflicting accounts and a lack of additional evidence have limited action. “The file has been inactivated pending further information.”

On the loss of potential evidence, he added: “Notably, there is CCTV outside the toilet block in question… When the incident was reviewed three months after occurring, footage was no longer available. Police is not aware of any mobile footage being acquired, or any other footage of what occurred inside the toilet block.”

Barry emphasised that schools and the Ministry of Education are responsible for maintaining procedures around evidence retention and referred questions to education officials.

The Ministry said schools are legally responsible for student safety under health and safety and education legislation.

Boards must have procedures to investigate incidents, document injuries, and monitor student welfare. Schools decide when to involve police, following natural justice principles, and must balance this with privacy laws and procedural requirements.

Sean Teddy, operations and integration leader, said: “Schools must have clear processes for managing injuries and serious incidents, including assaults. They’re responsible for ensuring the environment is safe, and for keeping proper records.”

He also noted: “Our traumatic incident teams can advise schools on supporting students emotionally and psychologically, and on when to liaise with police or other agencies.”