A war with no winners, only generations of hatred to come
Monday, 23 March 2026
Donna Miles is an Iranian-Kiwi columnist and writer based in Christchurch, and a regular opinion contributor.
OPINION: If not already, most Kiwis will soon be economically impacted by the far-reaching consequences of this completely reckless war. It is much easier to accept hardship, if there is meaning and purpose to our suffering, but here, there is none.
Kiwi lives, already affected by the cost of living, will become harder for no reason other than the inability of world leaders, including our own, to collectively stand up to two callous men, Trump and Netanyahu, drunk on hubris and power, starting an illegal war on Iran.
For many of us diaspora Iranians, the tragedy of this war is not limited to its economic impact - watching our ancient homeland bombed, its infrastructure destroyed, its historic sites damaged, and our compatriots pulled out of the rubble has an emotional toll that is hard to describe. It's like seeing your child suffer and wishing you could suffer for them; it's that sort of deep pain.
Read more:
Iranians celebrate and mourn attacks as expert says regime change unlikely
Considerable economic pain and a poorer NZ is unavoidable if war continues
For two-and-a-half years, we have all been witnessing the carpet bombing of Gaza, and watched countless videos of bombed residential buildings - and dead children being carried in the arms of their distraught parents. I always feared that one day the same fate would visit my own country but I had no idea how much bigger its emotional impact would be. Children are children, right? Of course - but the truth is, at a human level, we have an unspoken connection to those who share our language, eat the same food, live in the same city, walk on the same streets that were once the backdrop to so many of our formative experiences and memories in life.
It makes a difference, when the mother being pulled out of the rubble of her home, dazed and completely covered in grey dust, speaks in a language that requires no subtitles - that her words and her anxious tone are completely familiar: “My child, my daughter, is she alive?”
The destruction, especially in Tehran, has been extensive. I have watched countless videos of volunteers assisting the injured and carrying the dead, shopkeepers refusing to put up their prices, and people showing kindness and care to one another. This gives me heart and hope but I know the reality on the ground and among diaspora Iranians is not always as rosy.
There are huge divisions within our community and understandably emotions are running high. It is too easy to blame the destruction and suffering on the people who cheered on, and continue to participate in protests with Israeli flags - but some of these people are my close friends so I know them well. They are good people and their hearts are torn for our country and the suffering of its people, just as my heart is. This war is not their fault. Sure, they helped make it easier to sell the lie that the majority of Iranians were supportive of foreign intervention, but Netanyahu wanted this war and would have done it with or without them.
Many of them still believe there is no other way to bring change and liberate Iran. They believed this even before the unprecedented slaughter of thousands of Iranian protesters in January. I agree that Iran has indeed paid a huge price but it also has come a long way since the horrors of the early years of revolution through the political activism of its courageous women (look up the Women, Life, Freedom movement) and various unions and syndicates representing workers, teachers, retirees etc.
I think time will reveal the travesty of this war and the fraught vision of those who imagined it to be the light that lifts the darkness. The reality is that we live in a world with a thousand shades of grey, which is why politics and world affairs should not be treated as a sport where you pick a team and stick with it no matter what.
This war was based on lies.
Our Government knows this,they most likely shake their heads privately in disbelief at Trump's stupidity, but don't dare call him out publicly.
This illegal war will change our world forever, no matter how it will end. Iran, suffering for years under maximum sanctions, and presumably at its weakest point, has nevertheless survived three weeks of a war imposed on it by two military superpowers. This alone, is enough to force a complete rethink in the way military power is organised and importantly the role the US plays in the Middle East.
We would not be here today if we lived in a world that didn't look away as Gazan children were (and continue to be) starved and slaughtered.
This is a war whose opening strikes killed more than 150 Iranian schoolgirls. It is not clear how and when it will end, but I am certain there will be no winners - only hatred that will simmer in the hearts of its victims for generations to come.